Ahh Valentine’s Day… Where do I even begin? The day of “love”. It’s the day filled with chocolate, dinner reservations, flowers, jewelry, movie dates, and for some people, it ends with an engagement. Its the day where our social media timelines are flooded with pictures of happy couples expressing their love and appreciation for each other. Being surrounded by this all day long, I cant help but wonder:
Where does all of it leave you, my dear single friend?
Sometimes it may leave you feeling lonely, like everyone else gets to celebrate their significant other except you. It may leave you feeling tired or frustrated because instead of going out to a fancy restaurant, or receiving gifts, flowers, or chocolates, you may be at home alone wishing that you had someone you could share those special moments with.
And you know what my dear single friend? I have felt all of those same things too, sometimes even on days other than Valentine’s Day!
I have been single for 4 years now and as these holidays come around I definitely feel some of that loneliness and longing creep back into my heart. Because I too long to have someone to share these special moments with.
And can I be honest for a moment?
As I was scrolling through Instagram and Facebook, I felt myself getting not only sad, but increasingly irritated. My feed was flooded with tons of pictures of my friends or family celebrating Valentine’s Day and here I was alone in my apartment. Right in the middle of all the scrolling, I remember muttering to myself, “I wish I had someone who loved me!”. Immediately I felt conviction because in that moment, Jesus very quickly reminded me of how very untrue that statement was…
Its untrue because I AM loved. Very deeply, in fact. I am loved by my family, and I am loved by my friends. I am loved by my church, I am loved by the people in my young adult fellowship, and I am loved by the ladies in my women’s group. And they show their love for me in so many ways on a daily basis, not just one commercialized day. They show their love for me in the funny texts that they send me, or in the meals that we share together. They show me when they invite me to watch movies with them, or when they tell me they’ve been thinking about me, and then ask me how I am doing.
But above all the chocolate and flowers, above the sea of red, pink and white, and above my friends and family, I rest secure knowing that I am first and foremost abundantly loved by Jesus, the One who gave up EVERYTHING, even His very own life, to show me how much He loves me. He’s the One that gives overflowing love, joy, peace, and fulfillment. I find my identity in who He is and who He says that I am. I don’t know about you, but I’ll gladly take that love over anyone or anything else anyone can give!
I don’t need a teddy bear, chocolate, or flowers to know I am loved. Now please don’t get me wrong. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with celebrating Valentine’s Day with all of those things (I think its super sweet to do that!), I just think its important to remember that Valentine’s Day is exactly that: One DAY. One day out of the 364 days a year that people can show their love for you.
I also think that regardless of whether we have a significant other to celebrate with you today, you can still love and celebrate yourself! That’s right, while it feels nice to have other people express their love for you, YOU also have to love yourself too. Because no matter your status, whether single, dating, engaged, married etc, you are worthy of being loved, and that includes loving yourself.
So don’t let the rest of today go by without spending some time doing that! Here’s some examples of ways you can love and celebrate yourself:
- Get dressed up and go see a movie
- Grab some friends and go out to eat at your favorite restaurant
- Go find a karaoke bar and sing your heart out
- Do something active! Maybe take that new fitness class at the gym you’ve been wanting to take, or go mini golfing, laser tagging, or even axe throwing (I really want to try this!).
- Maybe stay at home and curl up on the couch with your go-to snack and read your favorite book.
So, dear single friend, let today serve as a reminder that though you may not have a significant other to share this day with, please remember that you are first and foremost, infinitely and abundantly seen, known, and loved by Jesus. Take time to remember the people already in your life that love and care for you, and don’t forget to do extend love to yourself, because you, my dear single friend, are worthy and deserving of all of it.
With love,
Your Dear Single Friend.
